Stupendously, Illawarra Win Again! Angus F-P Watches On

Illawarra have taken their unbeaten run in the 2011 ARTTSL Championship to eight matches, this time beating the controversy-racked Featherlite-Blowingpam-owned Tasmania 11-5 in Wollongong.

Angus Featherlite-Blowingpam, recently romantically linked with the late Bernard Elksteine's widow Patricia, was this time present at the match, having last week allegedly been photographed dancing in his underwear at the Normandy Hotel in Brisbane. Angus appeared mostly detached as he sat beside his staunch mother, Greteska Featherlite-Blowingpam, family matriarch, and appeared to feign a conversation on his mobile phone when reporters approached him at the end of the match.

Meanwhile the Gold Coast finally broke into the top 8, defeating Ipswich 11-7 at home.

Both Canberra and Sydney are holding on to Illawarra's coat-tails just one win (2 points) behind, having accounted for North Queensland 11-7 and Melbourne 11-7 respectively.

ARTTSL Premiership 2011, Round 8 Results
Gold Coast 11 d Ipswich 7 at Gold Coast
Sydney 11 d Melbourne 7 at Melbourne
Geelong 12 d Singapore 10 at Singapore
Darwin 12 d North Melbourne 10 at North Melbourne
North New Zealand 11 d Greater Blacktown 4 at Blacktown
Canberra 11 d North Queensland 7 at Canberra
Illawarra 11 d Tasmania 5 at Wollongong
Adelaide 12 d Sunshine Coast 10 at Adelaide
Newcastle 11 d Perth 9 at Newcastle
Brisbane 11 d South New Zealand 5 at Brisbane

Wilkington Tuffy Hospitalised With Pneumonia

ARTTSL President Wilkington Tuffy is the latest celebrity to be hospitalised with pneumonia.

ARTTSL Management released a short statement indicating the President will be in hospital for a number of days but competition will continue as normal. Tuffy continues to work from his bed in Sydney's Westmead Hospital.

ARTTSL Premiership 2011, Round 8 Fixtures
Gold Coast vs Ipswich (at Gold Coast)
Melbourne vs Sydney (at Melbourne)
Singapore vs Geelong (at Singapore)
North Melbourne vs Darwin (at North Melbourne)
Greater Blacktown vs North New Zealand (at Blacktown)
Canberra vs North Queensland (at Canberra)
Illawarra vs Tasmania (at Wollongong)
Adelaide vs Sunshine Coast (at Adelaide)
Newcastle vs Perth (at Newcastle)
Brisbane vs South New Zealand (at Brisbane)

BREAKING NEWS: Has Patricia Elksteine Found New Love?

Photographs have surfaced of Patricia Elksteine, widow of late Rebound Table Tennis Supremo Bernard Elksteine, dining and looking "more than happy" with soldier and socialite Angus Featherlite-Blowingpam.

The photographs, which allegedly show the couple enjoying fish and chips with an "unidentified companion", were submitted to several major newspapers late last week, however their publication has been withheld after ARTTSL President Wilkington Tuffy successfully applied for a Suppression Order through the Supreme Court on the basis that they would hurt the ARTTSL brand.

The photographs allegedly show the couple enjoying fish and chips "and each other", at the Aquarius Seafood Cafe in Sydney, as they appear to be a couple in the early stages of an intense relationship.

Angus is a relatively young member of the prominent Featherlite-Blowingpam family, which owns the ARTTSL Tasmania franchise. The family is also well known in social circles and Angus, approximately 15 years Patricia Elksteine's junior, is a full-time member of the army.

Angus is known to be "shy and well-mannered", however he is also prone to moments of poor judgement. As such the scandal deepened on Sunday night as Angus was allegedly photographed dancing in his underwear at the Normandy Hotel in Brisbane with members of the Brisbane ARTTSL side. He was as such notably absent from Tasmania's match with Greater Blacktown at Hobart, in which they went down narrowly 11-9. These photos are also covered by the current Suppression Order.

The Suppression Order suppresses the release of all photos related to the scandal, however legal advice indicates such Orders are frequently overturned on appeal. Wilkington Tuffy spoke briefly to the media.

"Patricia Elksteine's romantic life is her own business, however the Featherlite-Blowingpam's are owners of an ARTTSL Franchise so I would like to keep this situation under control until we can look into any risks of conflict of interest arising from such a relationship. That's my job as ARTTSL President, I need to protect the interests of Patricia Elksteine and the brand her late husband built so successfully. I'd like to speak to Patricia to clarify the matter but haven't been able to as yet, but I expect she'll contact me in due course. Once this is all resolved I strongly recommend we leave them to conduct their lives as they wish. I hope the photographs are destroyed".

Bernard Elksteine was found dead in his Maroochydore home in July 2010, after dying of a heart attack. However rumours have since arisen that he is alive and well in Morocco, having faked his own death. Patricia Elksteine has to date been reported to be in deep state of mourning and unable to leave the house for long periods of time. She has also frequently stated publicly that she believes Bernard did not die of a heart attack, but was murdered by one of his many enemies in the Rebound Table Tennis world.

ARTTSL Premiership 2011, Round 7 Results

Illawarra have miraculously pulled off their seventh straight victory, again by 2 points, this time against Perth.

The visitors looked in trouble down 5-2 before rallying to win 3 straight points, taking the match to 5-all at half time. Perth again pulled slightly ahead but Illawarra came back to 9-all then toook the final two points to win 11-9.

Meanwhile previous table leaders Brisbane suffered their second-straight defeat, this time thrashed by Ipswich in a lop-sided Brisbane local derby. The result was also marred by its connection to an as-yet-unclarified scandal involving a member of the Featherlite-Blowingpam family, who apparently danced in his underwear at the Normanby Hotel while partying with the losing Brisbane side. Rumours are swirling linking young Angus Featherlite-Blowingpam to Bernard Elksteine's widow, Patricia Elksteine.

Featherlite-Blowingpam was as such notably absent in Hobart as his family's Tasmania franchise went down 11-9 to Greater Blacktown.

Adelaide finally managed their first win of the season, comfortably beating Darwin 11-5. In the process Adelaide lifted themselves off the bottom of the table and handed the provisional wooden spoon to Darwin on points difference.

ARTTSL Premiership 2011, Round 7 Results
Adelaide 11 d Darwin 5 at Darwin
Ipswich 11 d Brisbane 3 at Ipswich
South New Zealand 11 d Singapore 8 at Christchurch
Illawarra 11 d Perth 9 at Perth
North New Zealand 11 d North Queensland 6 at Auckland
Sydney 11 d Gold Coast 4 at Sydney
Canberra 11 d North Melbourne 7 at North Melbourne
Greater Blacktown 11 d Tasmania 9 at Hobart
Sunshine Coast 11 d Melbourne 9 at Maroochydore
Newcastle 11 d Geelong 4 at Geelong

ARTTSL Championship 2011 - Round 7 Fixtures

Round 7 sees undefeated competition leaders Illawarra travel across the country to take on Ian McGovern, Jimmy Spring and the boys in Perth. After a slow start to the season, Perth have managed two wins in a row and there are signs of more to come. Can they finally bring Illawarra's dream run of 6 narrow wins from 6 matches to a halt?

Meanwhile Sydney Entertainment Centre has sold out already for the match between Sydney and the hard-charging Gold Coast, who have won their last four matches and are on the cusp of breaking into the top 8 on the back of form that took them to last year's Grand Final as Gold Coast-Tweed.

ARTTSL Championship 2011 - Round 7 Fixtures
Darwin vs Adelaide (at Darwin)
Ipswich vs Brisbane (at Ipswich)
South New Zealand vs Singapore (at Christchurch)
Perth vs Illawarra (at Perth)
North New Zealand vs North Queensland (at Auckland)
Sydney vs Gold Coast (at Sydney)
North Melbourne vs Canberra (at North Melbourne)
Tasmania vs Greater Blacktown (at Hobart)
Sunshine Coast vs Melbourne (at Maroochydore)
Geelong vs Newcastle (at Geelong)

ARTTSL Premiership 2011, Round 6 Results

Illawarra are the surprise front-runners after the first 6 rounds of the 2011 ARTTSL Premiership, being the only team to win 6 from 6. It was another narrow win, this time edging out Geelong 11-8 in front of a capacity crowd in Wollongong. With a total points difference of +15, Illawarra are only averaging wins of 2.5 points per match, but a win is a win.

It is a much unexpected situation for the club who finished last on the 2010 ARTTSL First Division ladder and faced certain relegation to second division this year, but gained a reprieve when the Divisional system was abolished after the resolution of that phase of the Rebound Table Tennis War. A 2011 Finals berth seems almost certain now so long as Illawarra can manage just a few more wins in the remaining 13 rounds.

Previous joint leaders Brisbane suffered their first defeat of the season, going down 11-7 to Sydney at home.

Gold Coast continue their impressive run of four straight wins after losing their first two matches, and have now moved up to the cusp of final contention in 9th place.

2010 Premiers Newcastle suffered their second defeat of the season, narrowly losing a 16-14 thriller at home to South New Zealand, in a spiteful and sometimes-violent encounter that included several table collapses.

ARTTSL Premiership 2011, Round 6 Results
Melbourne 11 d Darwin 8 at Melbourne
Sydney 11 d Brisbane 7 at Brisbane
Illawarra 11 d Geelong 8 at Wollongong
North Melbourne 11 d Adelaide 4 at Adelaide
Singapore 11 d Ipswich 8 at Singapore
Perth 11 d Greater Blacktown 7 at Blacktown
Canberra 11 d North New Zealand 9 at Canberra
North Queensland 11 d Tasmania 8 at Townsville
Gold Coast 11 d Sunshine Coast 7 at Gold Coast
South New Zealand 16 d Newcastle 14 at Newcastle

ARTTSL Premiership 2011 - Round 6 Fixtures

The highlight of Round 6 is ironically the bottom-of-the-table clash between Adelaide, the only side not to have won a match in 2011, and North Melbourne, who are second-last after one win and four major losses to give them a minus-19 points difference.

ARTTSL Premiership 2011 - Round 6 Fixtures
Melbourne vs Darwin (at Melbourne)
Brisbane vs Sydney (at Brisbane)
Illawarra vs Geelong (at Wollongong)
Adelaide vs North Melbourne (at Adelaide)
Singapore vs Ipswich (at Singapore)
Greater Blacktown vs Perth (at Blacktown)
Canberra vs North New Zealand (at Canberra)
North Queensland vs Tasmania (at Townsville)
Gold Coast vs Sunshine Coast (at Gold Coast)
Newcastle vs South New Zealand (at Newcastle)

Round 5 Results: Illawarra and Brisbane still on top

Brisbane and Illawarra remain the only undefeated teams after 5 rounds of the 2011 ARTTSL Championship.

Perth finally got their first win of 2011, crushing North Queensland 11-0, as Jimmy Spring finally started to find some form off the bench.

In another lopsided result, Sydney beat Singaore 11-0 in Sydney in front of a capacity crowd that included former NSW Premier Kristina Kh'neally.

The only team yet to manage a win now is Adelaide.

2010 runners-up Gold Coast (minus Tweed Heads) continue their climb back up the ladder after their third successive win, following losing their first two matches of the season.

ARTTSL Premiership 2011, Round 5 Results
Gold Coast 12 d Darwin 10 at Darwin
Perth 11 d North Queensland 0 at Perth
Sydney 11 d Singapore 0 at Sydney
Greater Blacktown 11 d Geelong 5 at Geelong
Illawarra 13 d South New Zealand 11 at Christchurch
Newcastle 11 d Ipswich 3 at Ipswich
Canberra 11 d Adelaide 3 at Adelaide
North Melbourne 11 d Melbourne 8 at North Melbourne
Brisbane 11 d Sunshine Coast 2 at Maroochydore
Tasmania 11 d North New Zealand 7 at Launceston

ARTTSL Premiership 2011, Round 5 Fixtures

Can Illawarra and/or Brisbane continue their great start to the season and make it 5 from 5?

ARTTSL Premiership 2011, Round 5 Fixtures:
Darwin vs Gold Coast (at Darwin)
Perth vs North Queensland (at Perth)
Sydney vs Singapore (at Sydney)
Geelong vs Greater Blacktown (at Geelong)
South New Zealand vs Illawarra (at Christchurch)
Ipswich vs Newcastle (at Ipswich)
Adelaide vs Canberra (at Adelaide)
North Melbourne vs Melbourne (at North Melbourne)
Sunshine Coast vs Brisbane (at Maroochydore)
Tasmania vs North New Zealand (at Launceston)

Round 4 Results: Brisbane, Illawarra Undefeated

Brisband and Illawarra remain the only sides undefeated after the first four rounds of the 2011 ARTTSL Premiership.

Brisbane comfortably accounted for Darwin 11-6 in Brisbane, while Illawarra narrowly beat a hard-fighting Ipswich in extra time, 13-11 in Wollongong.

Premiers and last week's leaders Newcastle were upset at home by Sydney 11-9.

Rumours are intensifying that Jimmy Spring's return to Rebound Table Tennis is under threat after Perth fell to its fourth straight loss, this time 12-10 to North New Zealand in Wellington.

ARTTSL Premiership 2011, Round 4 Results
North New Zealand 12 d Perth 10 at Wellington
Sydney 11 d Newcastle 9 at Newcastle
Brisbane 11 d Darwin 6 at Brisbane
Melbourne 11 d Adelaide 6 at Melbourne
Gold Coast 11 d North Melbourne 7 at Gold Coast
North Queensland 11 d Geelong 9 at Cairnes
South New Zealand 11 d Greater Blacktown 7 at Blacktown
Canberra 12 d Tasmania 10 at Canberra
Illawarra 13 d Ipswich 11 at Wollongong
Singapore 11 d Sunshine Coast 7 at Singapore

ARTTSL Round 4 Fixtures

Round 4 of the 2011 ARTTSL Premiership kicks off this weekend with North New Zealand hosting Perth in Wellington. Rebound Table Tennis Legend Jimmy Spring will again play off the bench as he tries to regain match form and Perth hope to finally get their first win for 2011. Ian McGovern remains Perth captain. North New Zealand are also yet to win a match this year.

Rumours have swirled this week that Perth may not be satisfied with Spring's early difficulties in regaining form, but the club say it has no plans to replace Spring in the first-grade squad this early in the season. They say they expect it will take him several matches to start hitting his old stride.

Reigning Premiers and current table leaders Newcastle host Sydney.

ARTTSL Premiership 2011, Round 4
North New Zealand vs Perth (at Wellington)
Newcastle vs Sydney (at Newcastle)
Brisbane vs Darwin (at Brisbane)
Melbourne vs Adelaide (at Melbourne)
GoldCoast vs North Melbourne (at Gold Coast)
North Queensland vs Geelong (at Cairnes)
Greater Blacktown vs South New Zealand (at Blacktown)
Canberra vs Tasmania (at Canberra)
Illawarra vs Ipswich (at Wollongong)
Singapore vs Sunshine Coast (at Singapore)

ARTTSL 2011 Premiership Table after Round 3 of 19

Newcastle On Top, Hotdog Maniac Ejected in Sydney

Newcastle lead the ARTTSL 2011 Championship after a third decisive victory, this time over the fancied Sunshine Coast in Maroochydore 11-3. The 2010 Premiers now have a +20 points difference after only 3 matches, an average win of 6.67 points per match.

Illawarra have continued their remarkable return to form, beating Sydney 12-10 in a thriller at Leichhardt Oval. The match was marred however by an Illawarra supporter who went berzerk and ran onto the field wielding a hotdog, chasing after ARTTSL President Wilkington Tuffy, who attended the match. Security staff managed to contain the assailant after chasing him around the table several times before finally realising that if one guard went one way and the other the other way they'd cut him off. Tuffy suffered some minor sauce splattering, but later laughed off the incident as the act of a man known to him, identified only as "Paul", who has been letting him know for some time about his frustrations with Tuffy's apparent appetite for revenue through food and merchandise sales. The price of hotdogs had been put up from $12.50 to $14 before the match. The manager of the food outlet, Coreen Saunders, said the price rise had been a direct order from Tuffy himself. Saunders was later fired for her comments.

Rebound Table Tennis Legend Jimmy Spring was again unable to help Perth clinch their first victory of the year, as the side narrowly went down 11-9 to Tasmania at home. Spring made some fundamental errors during his brief stint at the table and was quickly returned to the bench by captain Ian McGovern. The decision, while seemingly justified, appeared to cause some tension between Spring and McGovern.

Previous table leaders Canberra suffered their first loss of the season, going down 11-7 to 2009 Premiers Melbourne.

ARTTSL Premiership 2011, Round 3 Results
Melbourne 11 d Canberra 7 at Melbourne
Gold Coast 11 d Adelaide 4 at Adelaide
Tasmania 11 d Perth 9 at Perth
Darwin 11 d Singapore 9 at Darwin
Brisbane 11 d North Melbourne 6 at North Melbourne
Geelong 12 d North New Zealand 10 at Geelong
Ipswich 11 d Greater Blacktown 8 at Ipswich
Newcastle 11 d Sunshine Coast 3 at Maroochydore
Illawarra 12 d Sydney 10 at Sydney
North Queensland 11 d South New Zealand 9 at Christchurch

ARTTSL 2011 Premiership - Round 3 Fixtures

Rebound Table Tennis Legend Jimmy Spring will make his first home appearance for Perth, again confirmed not to be captain and playing off the bench. He is however expected to see more game time this week as Perth play Tasmania. Both sides are yet to record a win this season.

Other highlights of the week include competition leaders Canberra travelling to Melbourne to play the 2009 Premiers. Adelaide host last year's runners-up Gold Coast, who languish at the bottom of the table aftet two big losses.

Meanwhile Sydney host Illawarra as both sides try to make it three wins from their first three matches in 2011. Illawarra are enjoying a great return to form after finished dead last in the 2010 ARTTSL Premiership.

ARTTSL 2011 Premiership - Round 3 Fixtures:
Melbourne vs Canberra (at Melbourne)
Adelaide vs Gold Coast (at Adelaide)
Perth vs Tasmania (at Perth)
Darwin vs Singapore (at Darwin)
North Melbourne vs Brisbane (at North Melbourne)
Geelong vs North New Zealand (at Geelong)
Ipswich vs Greater Blacktown (at Ipswich)
Sunshine Coast vs Newcastle (at Maroochydore)
Sydney vs Illawarra (at Sydney)
South New Zealand vs North Queensland (at Christchurch)

ARTTSL 2011 Premiership Table after Round 2 of 19

ARTTSL Round 2 Results

Rebound Table Tennis Legend Jimmy Spring played a small role off the bench in Perth's second straight loss of the 2011 season, going down 11-4 to Canberra. The win is Canberra's second after two rounds, with their remarkable +17 points difference launching them to the top of the ARTTSL Premiership table.

In New Zealand, the local derby saw South New Zealand narrowly defeat North New Zealand 11-9 in Auckland. The only injury of the match was South New Zealand mascot The Big Peter Jackson, who injured his groin trying to crash-tackle his arch rival, North New Zealand mascot The Big Pippie, early in the second half. Jackson spent the remainder of the match on a chair but was able to whoop up the large Canterbury contingent in the crowd to get his side home.

In the other local derby of the round, new side Greater Blacktown almost pulled off a miracle when they led the more experienced Sydney 10-9 late in the match, only to go down 12-10 in extra time.

Last year's Grand Finalists the Gold Coast continued their poor start to the season, going down at home 11-5 to Melbourne, leaving them languishing at the bottom of the table.

Meanwhile 2010 Premiers Newcastle continued their great start to the season, crushing Darwin 11-3 in front of a capacity home crowd at Newcastle International Rebound Table Tennis Centre.

ARTTSL Premiership 2011, Round 2 Results
Melbourne 11 d Gold Coast 5 at Gold Coast
Illawarra 12 d Sunshine Coast 10 at Wollongong
Singapore 11 d North Melbourne 2 at Singapore
North Queensland 11 d Ipswich 6 at Townsville
Geelong 11 d Tasmania 9 at Hobart
Canberra 11 d Perth 4 at Canberra
Newcastle 11 d Darwin 3 at Newcastle
South New Zealand 11 d North New Zealand 9 at Auckland
Sydney 12 d Greater Blacktown 10 at Blacktown
Brisbane 11 d Adelaide 9 at Brisbane

ARTTSL Round 2 Fixtures

Rebound Table Tennis Legend Jimmy Spring will travel with his new club Perth to play Canberra in the National Capital this weekend.

Perth have provided no further information except to confirm that Ian McGovern will remain as captain, while Spring will play off the bench this week, replacing round 1 reserve Marlon Pruitt.

Auckland will host the New Zealand local derby between North New Zealand and South New Zealand. No doubt their mascots, the Big Pippie and the Big Peter Jackson, will be at it again on the sideline.

Meanwhile in another local derby, Sydney will travel to Blacktown to take on new western Sydney-based club Greater Blacktown, who went down gallantly to Sunshine Coast in Maroochydore in the first ever match last weekend.

ARTTSL 2011 Premiership - Round 2:

Gold Coast vs Melbourne (at Gold Coast)
Illawarra vs Sunshine Coast (at Wollongong)
Singapore vs North Melbourne (at Singapore)
North Queensland vs Ipswich (at Townsville)
Tasmania vs Geelong (at Hobart)
Canberra vs Perth (at Canberra)
Newcastle vs Darwin (at Newcastle)
North New Zealand vs South New Zealand (at Auckland)
Greater Blacktown vs Sydney (at Blacktown)
Brisbane vs Adelaide (at Brisbane)

Late Mail: Jimmy Spring Signs With Perth

No further details are known at this time. More as it comes to hand...

Gold Coast, Newcastle, Perth All Race To Sign Spring

Returning Rebound Table Tennis legend Jimmy Spring has been linked with three clubs: Gold Coast, Newcastle and Perth.

Spring's shock announcement that he plans to return to competitive Rebound Table Tennis seemingly did not fall on deaf ears, with all three clubs (and possibly more) reported to have offered deals.

Gold Coast are believed to be the front-runner, having reportedly offered Spring a contract including pay and endorsements totalling over $1 million. This would make Spring Rebound Table Tennis's first million-dollar player.

The question, of course, is how Spring would perform and if he really would be the silver bullet the struggling but cashed-up Gold Coast club would be hoping for.

A signing with Premiers Newcastle would no doubt further strengthen their credentials as 2011 favourites, while signing with Perth may lead to Captaincy disputes after the young Ian McGovern recently took over the Captaincy. Once source suggested that Perth had been aware of Spring's imminent return for some time and that McGovern was installed only as a caretaker captain while Spring prepared for his stunning return home.

Spring is expected to confirm a contract signing by tomorrow (Wednesday) to meet ARTTSL's registration requirements to be allowed to commence play in Round 2.

Rebound Table Tennis Legend Jimmy Spring

ARTTSL Premiership 2011, Round 1 Results

Canberra have taken the early lead after Round 1 with a crushing 11-1 victory over the Gold Coast. The Gold Coast appeared to be suffering as expected from its separation from the Tweed Heads component, which left the joint venture after losing last year's Grand Final to Newcastle.

New club Ipswich recorded an emphatic victory, overcoming North New Zealand 11-2.

2010 Premiers Newcastle accounted for new club North Melboourne 11-7.

South New Zealand narrowly defeated Tasmania in a 13-11 thriller in Christchurch.

ARTTSL Premiership 2011, Round 1 Results
Canberra 11 d Gold Coast 1 at Gold Coast
Ipswich 11 d North New Zealand 2 at Ipswich
Newcastle 11 d North Melbourne 7 at North Melbourne
Singapore 11 d Adelaide 9 at Adelaide
South New Zealand 13 d Tasmania 11 at Christchurch
Sunshine Coast 11 d Greater Blacktown 6 at Maroochydore
Sydney 11 d North Queensland 7 at Sydney
Illawarra 11 d Darwin 7 at Darwin
Geelong 11 d Perth 8 at Geelong
Brisbane 11 d Melbourne 7 at Melbourne